You’re spiraling. And nothing’s working.
Maybe you’re in public, trying to act normal while your chest is tight and your thoughts are screaming.
Or maybe you’re lying in bed, eyes wide open, replaying everything that went wrong today.
And you Google something like:
“How to calm anxiety in public.”
Or
“Why don’t grounding techniques work on me?”
You’re not alone.
Here’s one strange trick that sounds silly but works like magic for some people.
Not because it’s cute.
But because it finally gives your brain something real and doable.
Try This: Turn Your Anxiety Into a Cartoon Character
Seriously.
Imagine that anxious part of you — the one that says:
“This is going to go wrong.”
“You’re messing up.”
“Everyone’s judging you.”
Give it a face. Not yours.
Make it a separate character.
Now picture it… as a whiny little gremlin.
Or a lizard in a tie, pacing in your brain.
Or a dramatic toddler screaming on a supermarket floor.
Not scary.
Just loud, needy, a bit over the top.
Got the image?
Good. Now talk to it like you would to a child throwing a tantrum.
“Okay, okay. I hear you.
But we’re not doing this right now.”
“You can sit in the backseat. I’m still driving.”
You can even give it a name.
“Oh, here comes Panic Pete again.”
This is not a joke. This is called externalizing — and your brain loves it.
Why This Works
This isn’t just a quirky imagination game.
There’s real brain science behind it.
When you’re anxious, your mind fuses with fear.
It feels like you are the anxiety. Like the voice is yours. Like the fear is true.
But the moment you say,
“This isn’t me. This is just Anxious Me talking.”
You start pulling apart from it.
Here’s what that does:
1. Externalization
You turn anxiety into something separate from your identity.
It’s not “I’m falling apart.” It’s:
“My anxiety is loud today.”
That small shift reduces shame and panic. It gives you distance.
2. Self-distancing
You stop reacting from inside the fear, and start observing it – like watching a noisy neighbor.
That’s called self-distancing, and research shows it reduces emotional reactivity and helps you stay grounded.
Your brain calms down when it sees the problem from the outside.
3. Cognitive Defusion
In Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), this is called “defusion.”
Instead of wrestling with the thought (“What if I mess up?”), you name it, shrink it, and carry on.
The brain starts to say:
“Oh, this isn’t danger. This is just that voice again.”
It’s like turning a monster into a cartoon.
It’s still there… but it’s not so scary now.
You Can Do This Anywhere – Even in Public
Next time the panic rises:
- Pause. Don’t fight it.
Say in your mind: “Okay, anxiety’s here. I see you.” - Picture it clearly.
Close your eyes for 3 seconds if you can. Imagine your anxious character.
Maybe it’s biting its nails. Maybe it’s flapping its arms.
Make it cartoonish, harmless, even dramatic. - Respond like you’re the adult. “I get it. You’re scared. But we’re okay.”
“You can sit in the backseat. I’m still the driver.” - Breathe – not to force calm, but to send a signal: I’m in charge now.
You’re not pretending you’re fine.
You’re just choosing who gets the mic.
You don’t need privacy.
You don’t need silence.
You just need the mental image – and the decision to not let it drive.
Why This Works When Nothing Else Does
Most people try to shut anxiety up.
But fighting it usually makes it louder.
This technique does something different:
It says,
“I see you. You can come with me — but I’m leading now.”
That’s the part that shifts everything.
It’s not about feeling great.
It’s about feeling in control again, even just a little.
And sometimes, that’s all you need.
❌ Common Mistakes to Avoid
- Don’t try to fight the character. That makes it louder.
- Don’t aim for instant calm – aim for space. That’s enough.
- Don’t worry if you still feel anxious. This tool is about changing the relationship, not erasing the feeling.
⚠️ A Gentle Reminder
This won’t work for everyone.
And even if it does, it might not work every time. That’s okay.
Therapy helps you figure out what actually fits your brain.
This is one of many tools.
But it might be the one that gets you through today.
And if this resonated, and you want more of these tools?
✋ If this resonated…
👉 Book an appointment here.
Let’s figure out what works for your mind – together.
